iHate Fortune Cookies
by SkyeNite
Summary: The stories behind Sam's Fortune Cookie Blog. Seddie! One shot


Sam had became obsessed. Almost as obsessed as she is with ham. _Almost. _

Everyday she would suggest that, instead of the Groovy Smoothie, they go to the Chinese restaurant across from it after school. Freddie always objected, but of course he always gave in. Most times Sam figured that he only gave in because Carly asked him to. Rarely though, the thought would cross her mind that he only protested to find a reason to argue with her. Like when he turned out to be an expert at chop stick usage and when the waiter some how new him by name.

"So I had a Chinese food phase a few years ago" he said in his defense " Now I'm just kinda sick of it" Sam just smirked and reached for her fortune cookie, Freddie noted somewhere in the back of his mind that this was the first time Sam was surrounded by food and yet more interested in something else. Sam read her fortune.

"An unexpected event will soon bring you… poverty and unhappiness?"

Carly tried to make Sam feel better by saying that they were all probably just duds. So she broke her own cookie and read it out loud.

"Be cautious not to forget an important event?"

It was then that Carly remember that her Grandfather was visiting today and should have been home half an hour ago to greet him. She ran out of the restaurant leaving her plate virtually untouched.

"Well," she said, more to herself then Freddie, "No reason to waste good chicken"

Freddie's phone began to ring. He answered to the voice of his frantic mother yelling something to the effect of "I saw Carly go home but you weren't with her!" and "You better not be out alone with that _Sam_!" Saying _Sam _as if she was some kind of sickening infectious disease which in Ms. Benson's mind she was. Freddie left the restaurant leaving the money for his meal which was mostly gone with the exception of his fortune cookie. Sam was nearly done with Carly's chicken when the waiter came over and left the bill. It was at that moment when Sam realized that Carly got Chicken Chow Mien the most expensive chicken dish on the menu, and Carly forgot to leave the money to pay for it. Sam looked in her wallet realizing that to only way she'll be able to pay for both meals is if she used the all the money she had.

She sighed and grabbed what used to be Freddie's fortune cookie. She broke it and read the fortune.

_**You should NOT have eaten the chicken.**_

______________

It was a few hours later and has Sam stared at the white bathroom tiles she realized that she REALLY should NOT have eaten the chicken.

_______________________________

It was a rehearsal day for iCarly. Sam suggested they take a quick break and order some take out, or more specifically Chinese take out. Carly had recently been impressed with how much effort Sam had been putting into iCarly that week and even though she knew it was just because Sam had some crazy idea about karma being the cause of her recent bad fortunes she still thought it should be rewarded. So they ordered Chinese and Sam got extra fortune cookies this time.

The delivery guy asked if he could play in the toilet water again as Sam closed the door in his face. The first thing she did was grab her fortune cookies and break them each open reading them aloud.

"Help me I'm trapped in a fortune cookie warehouse? … Secrets await you at the city dump? …Your hard work will probably never pay off? What the heck does a girl have to do to get a good fortune!?

"Ha, apparently from a fortune cookie warehouse by the city dump." Carly chimed in what she thought was an obviously sarcastic tone. Sam, however, took her seriously remembering that there is indeed an old warehouse next to the city dump. So she went to explore it and found out what was waiting for her… a broken floor board. This resulted in Sam being rushed to the hospital. A couple hours late she found out she just had a sprained wrist but the hospital still wanted to monitor her for 24 hours since that warehouse may have had a toxic mold in it that could take effect at any time without warning. This resulted in Sam missing the first iCarly that she planned more than 30% of.

____________

Sam was just released from the hospital and Carly and Freddie took her out for Chinese food. Carly was certain that Sam would never want to look at another fortune cookie again yet Sam insisted that they go for Chinese.

They got there meals and for once Sam didn't grab for her cookie but instead dug into her meal. When Carly asked why she said something about it being bad luck to open a fortune cookie before you finish your meal. Carly was nearly finished when she began texting someone. She suddenly got up and said she had to go. Freddie made sure that she was not going home since he really didn't feel like going home himself yet and Carly assured him that she would text him the moment she decides to go home. She still never said were she was going but Sam knew she was going to meet up with Griffin.. For the third time that week. They weren't really dating again since Carly still hadn't fully gotten over the peewee baby thing but Carly did discover that she really enjoys hanging out with him even when there isn't kissing involved.

Sam finished her meal and reached for her cookie. She then realized that her sprained wrist made it a little difficult to break the cookie. Freddie stared at her attempts at opening it with a small amused smile on his face and decided to offer her help before she just decided to crush the cookie in her right hand. Sam stared at him with her dagger like eyes for a second and handed him the cookie with a frustrated look on her face. Most people would think she was being rude but Freddie understood that was the way she said thank you. At least towards him. He broke the cookie for her and looked at the cookie, he then got an annoyed looked on his face and asked her if she planted a virus on his computer again. She smirked and asked him why. He responded by reading her fortune out loud.

"I know what you did last Thursday. NOT COOL!"

Sam looked puzzled "Oh… No I did that Wednesday…"

"Sam!"

"I'm just kidding don't get your anti bacterial underwear in a bunch."

He looked at her a moment annoyed, which is usually how he looked at her even when she wasn't annoying him. He would always remind himself of the annoying things that she did because if he didn't he would have to deal feeling something other than annoyance towards her and that could end painfully, so he'd really rather not even go there.

"So?' he asked his calm tone not really matching the expression on his face

"So what?"

"So what DID you do last Thursday." Sam though a moment, the only thing remembered doing was yelling at Wendy. So she told him that. When he asked what she yelled at her for she said she couldn't remember and he knew she was lying. Unlike normal people Sam seems to get more nervous when she tells the truth then when she lies. So he was certain that she remembered and just didn't want to tell him. He was right to. Sam remembered exactly why she yelled at Wendy and "yell" was really an understatement. She flip out on Wendy but she felt she had every right to. Wendy was trying to get her to admit that she had feelings for Freddie. So she felt totally justified in flipping out on her because she SO DOES NOT have feelings for Freddie… at least that's what she tells her self every morning and every night when she finds herself accidentally entertaining thoughts of him.

They both get up after the bill is paid (this time Carly remembered to leave her share) Freddie wraps his un-opened fortune cookie in his napkin and places it in his jacket pocket. They leave and Freddie starts walking with Sam to her house. For a few blocks it was silent. A nice silence at first while they're enjoying the night air and staring at the stars in the sky but after a while it becomes a boring silence, for Freddie at least. Not awkward, just boring. Freddie just felt in the mood to talk.

"I know you were lying."

"What?"

"About the fight with Wendy, I could tell you were lying"

Sam cocked an eye brow and stared at him, "So?"

"I'm just saying, your not as good a liar as you give yourself credit for sometimes."

"Excuse me? I won third place in the Washington State Lying contest remember?"

"I already know that there's no such thing Sam, everyone has a tell when it comes to lying. Yours just happens to be less obvious then most."

"I do not have a tell."

"Yes you do."

"Ok, what is it then?"

"Your not nervous." Sam cocked her eye brow at him again and tried to understand his logic to know avail. Freddie smirked and continued to explain.

"Sam, the only time I have ever seen that famous poker face of yours falter is when your telling the truth. You can lie without a conscience but telling the truth, THAT makes you nervous."

Sam stared at him for only a few more seconds before looking ahead again.

"Your such a total nerd." Was her only response and Freddie considered telling her that he knew that was her way of admitting that he was right.

He put his hands in his pockets and remembered the fortune cookie.

"I actually doubt I'm going to eat this, you want it."

"Do you really need to ask?"

Freddie broke the fortune cookie for her and read the fortune. Suddenly he stopped dead in his tracks. Sam looked back at him and asked him what it said. He folded the little piece of paper in half and handed it to her. "I think you better just read it yourself, I think I should go and head home now though its getting late."

He walked away and turned a corner and was gone. Sam stood there bewildered and wondered what the fortune could possibly say that would cause her to be so angry that she would hurt him worst then usual. Because it was obvious to her that was why he left, and she was write. She looked at the little b\piece of folded paper and opened it. She gaped that words. Yah she definitely would have hurt him. Especially if he would of said it out loud.

_**You will fall in love with a total nerd.**_


End file.
